For decades, Aurora looked into her garden at night and imagined evil eyes watching her from the bushes. Then, after two coaching conversations, the old movie stopped and she was finally able to see the beautiful garden that had been there all along.

Part 1 of 4 - The Nightmares

After my parents died, my sleeping mind kept returning to the moments when it believed the ending could still be changed. In Part One, I explore the questions hidden beneath the nightmares and why waking up did not bring them to an end.

Part 2 of 4 - What Was Hidden Inside My Grief

Grief was the word I used to explain everything. But beneath it were despair, regret, over-responsibility, loneliness, longing, frustration and fear. In Part Two, I unpack what each emotion meant and what it was trying to do for me.

Part 3 of 4 - The Coaching Conversations

Five pivotal moments during coaching conversations changed how I related to my parents’ deaths. In Part Three, I explore the questions and interventions that helped me understand my grief differently.

Part 4 of 4 - The Reframes

Coaching did not erase my grief or change the past. In Part Four, I share the reframes that helped me release the unhelpful thoughts and feelings, accept what I could not change and remember my parents whilst feeling genuinely at peace.

Part 1 of 2 — Understanding the Process

After a day of anger and frustration at work, do you keep that anger and frustration with you when you come home, perhaps even letting it out on the people you love? Or does it leave your mind-body system once you are back home?

Part 2 of 2 — Understanding the Context

His negative emotions tend to stay in their context in time and space. When he is with the people he cares about, he can turn his mind fully towards them in that moment.